Oak Park is a leafy suburb of Chicago best known as the birthplace of Ernest Hemingway. It also was one of the Chicago area jurisdictions that banned possession of handguns until the McDonald v. Chicago decision by the U.S. Supreme Court.
Oak Park, it appears, has a pigeon problem, one bad enough that it repealed an ordinance against euthanizing them and is looking to terminate with extreme prejudice about 20 birds that roost under a viaduct at a cost of $15,000.
That’s right: 15 grand to kill 20 pigeons.
According to the Chicago Tribune, the town wants to use an agency that will trap the birds and finish them off einsatzgruppen-style by pumping carbon dioxide over them.
Here’s a modest proposal: a couple of teenaged boys at $50 a day with pellet rifles and about $10 worth of pellets. Keep the other $14,890.